Healthy Relationships

Understanding Intimate Partner Violence (IPV)

Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) isn’t only about physical harm; it can include emotional, psychological, sexual, and financial abuse. IPV is any behavior in a relationship—whether with a current or ex-partner—intended to control, harm, or intimidate. While often associated with female victims, it’s important to know that men can also experience IPV—in fact, around 40% of IPV cases involve men as victims. These situations can happen in any relationship, whether heterosexual or same-sex, and the effects on mental and emotional health can be profound.

If you’re reading this because you think you may be in an abusive relationship with a current or ex-partner, you’re not alone. Recognizing IPV can be difficult, as it often involves subtle tactics that erode confidence, induce fear, or isolate you from support networks. Many men feel pressure to downplay their experiences, but abuse of any form is unacceptable, and support is available.

Examples of abuse are controlling behaviour, verbal insults, financial, physical, sexual abuse

Signs You Might Be Experiencing IPV

• Feeling controlled or constantly monitored.

• Experiencing verbal insults, humiliation, or manipulation.

• Feeling isolated or distanced from friends and family.

• Financial control, such as restricting access to your own income.

• Experiencing physical violence or threats.

At MenAsWell, we can help you find the right support. Whether you need guidance on building a safety plan, information on support groups, or just someone to talk to, we can help you take the first steps toward safety and healing.

40% of IPV cases involve men as victims

Your key contacts

Slachtofferhulp

Slachtofferhulp.nl

Slachtofferhulp is the victim support agency in the Netherlands. They can provide you with legal, practical and financial support.

Veilig Thuis

0800 2000

Veilig thuis is the domestic violence agency in the Netherlands.

MenAswell

Menaswell.nl

MenAsWell' is the Dutch foundation for male victims of sexual and domestic violence.

Tips for staying safe

If you’re in an abusive relationship with a current or ex-partner, prioritizing your safety is crucial. Here are some practical steps to help protect yourself:

  • Plan safe locations you can go to if you need to leave quickly. Have an emergency bag packed with essentials like identification, cash, and important documents. Store it somewhere accessible but hidden.

  • Share your situation with friends, family, or colleagues who can offer support. Consider setting up a code word to signal an emergency discreetly.

  • Keep a private record of any incidents, including dates, times, and descriptions. This documentation can be valuable if you decide to take legal action or seek protection. text goes here

  • Secure your digital devices by changing passwords and using private browsing modes. Abusers may try to monitor your activities through shared devices or accounts. It can be a good idea to make sure your old phones are safe.

  • Use a trusted phone or email account to communicate with support organizations, especially if your devices are being monitored. MenAsWell and other organizations can provide confidential guidance on how to stay safe.

  • Familiarize yourself with local laws around restraining orders or protection orders. MenAsWell can connect you with legal resources to understand your rights and options for safeguarding yourself.

  • If you feel unsafe, trust your instincts and act on them. Avoid situations where you may be alone with your abuser, and don’t hesitate to remove yourself from unsafe environments